What you're about to read is something I wrote just out of the blue one evening. It's not based on anyone in particular. I just came up with the first line, and like most things, it went on from there. Maybe it'll mean something to you.
It was amazing, the way she just smiled, like everything was all right when it clearly wasn't. But somehow, she believed it was. She had such an unusual propensity towards hope and joy, laughter and optimism, that she truly believed it could all be okay and work out in the end, no matter the odds.
I think that's what drew us to her--she had a light that couldn't be extinguished. And she knew how much that meant to us, so she never let us see her falter. She kept her tears, her darkest secrets, and her deepest fears hidden, because if she were afraid, what chance did the rest of us have?
Sometimes I saw the chinks in her armour. I loved her for them, but what I always loved and admired most was that smile, that laughter, those bright eyes that never dimmed, even when she was feeling weak.
Nothing could make her lose sight of that beautiful morning she always saw, even at the edge of her darkest horizon. To her, darkness was merely a medium to let the light shine all the more dazzlingly. For her, the stars and the moon were just as lovely as the sun, if not more so.
Her smile and laughter communicated a wealth of emotions stored up inside her. I got to know her well enough that I could distinguish her genuinely happy smiles from those that came after a teary hour or anxious pondering, because those were more akin to those of a rainbow than those of sunlight.
I never truly understood why she preferred gloomy weather, but I think it had to do with whatever awakening she experienced that made her that way. She'd told me once that she hadn't always been this way, but she never explained more than that.
I think there was a time in her life that was so dark and dreary, she saw no escape. Yet somehow, she'd made it through. Somehow, somewhere, she'd found just enough light to hold on to, and once she realized how strong that light was, once the clouds parted and she could see clearly, she decided to never let go.
I wish I had asked why. I wish I had asked her to tell me her story. But somehow, I think I already know what she'd say: "Does it really even matter?"
Anyway, there you have it.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Good night."
Monday, December 9, 2019
Thursday, July 18, 2019
Have Another Laugh
As it's the end of the semester, I've once again compiled the funniest quotes from my classes to share with you all. Enjoy. Or don't, it's up to you.
English
Professor: It's like beating a dead dog.
Student, clearly horrified: It's a horse! A dead horse!
Student 1: I became an aunt.
Student 2: A Canadian?
Student 1: An aunt.
*Student 2 still looks confused*
Student 1: Like, my sister had a baby.
Student 2: Oh, an aunt. I thought you meant the insect and I was like, "All right, Ant-Woman."
Professor: Make sure you tell them what they need to fix, otherwise you're lying.
Student, wisely: And lying's a felony.
Math
Professor: Do you guys go on dates? Well, probably not.
Professor: I should've erased all the trig stuff from the board, it's kind of threatening.
Professor: What in heaven's name would make you want to be a mortician?
Humanities
Student: I got a magic kit when I was twelve, and my parents were like, "I don't know, Satan maybe?"
Student: Undisputed.
Professor: Can you elaborate on that?
Student: No.
Professor: It's hard to impressionate. Impressionate?
*a student played her flute for us*
Professor: Can you play contemporary music? Can you play "Thunderstruck" by ACDC?
Student: Why not?
*Professor looks at me with a mixture of amusement and concern*
*student grabs a cookie*
Professor: You took one of mine! And he pranced.
Psychology (my personal favorite)
Professor: I'm five foot six, which is average...for American women.
Professor: June suckers are ugly as sin.
*The volume was all whacked, but he got it figured out.*
Professor: Well, it's working, but it's at 900 percent, which means that when it fixes itself, it's going to kill all of you.
Professor: Spicy's not a flavor. Spicy's a pain. I have to put pain on all my food.
Professor: You never want to just Google homunculus.
(He was right, please don't.)
Student: Did you always hate pandas?
Professor: No. I was drinking the Kool-Aid with everybody else.
Professor: Have any of you seen the new Aladdin yet?
Student: Don't spoil it!
Professor: Spoil what?! That's like if another Titanic movie came out and you told someone not to spoil it! In what universe would they not end up together?!
Professor: I don't hate myself enough to exercise.
*student asks what promiscuity means*
Professor: That's "get up in your club and whatever with your whatever."
All right, well, I hope that wasn't a total waste of your time. Fare thee well, my friends.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
English
Professor: It's like beating a dead dog.
Student, clearly horrified: It's a horse! A dead horse!
Student 1: I became an aunt.
Student 2: A Canadian?
Student 1: An aunt.
*Student 2 still looks confused*
Student 1: Like, my sister had a baby.
Student 2: Oh, an aunt. I thought you meant the insect and I was like, "All right, Ant-Woman."
Professor: Make sure you tell them what they need to fix, otherwise you're lying.
Student, wisely: And lying's a felony.
Math
Professor: Do you guys go on dates? Well, probably not.
Professor: I should've erased all the trig stuff from the board, it's kind of threatening.
Professor: What in heaven's name would make you want to be a mortician?
Humanities
Student: I got a magic kit when I was twelve, and my parents were like, "I don't know, Satan maybe?"
Student: Undisputed.
Professor: Can you elaborate on that?
Student: No.
Professor: It's hard to impressionate. Impressionate?
*a student played her flute for us*
Professor: Can you play contemporary music? Can you play "Thunderstruck" by ACDC?
Student: Why not?
*Professor looks at me with a mixture of amusement and concern*
*student grabs a cookie*
Professor: You took one of mine! And he pranced.
Psychology (my personal favorite)
Professor: I'm five foot six, which is average...for American women.
Professor: June suckers are ugly as sin.
*The volume was all whacked, but he got it figured out.*
Professor: Well, it's working, but it's at 900 percent, which means that when it fixes itself, it's going to kill all of you.
Professor: Spicy's not a flavor. Spicy's a pain. I have to put pain on all my food.
Professor: You never want to just Google homunculus.
(He was right, please don't.)
Student: Did you always hate pandas?
Professor: No. I was drinking the Kool-Aid with everybody else.
Professor: Have any of you seen the new Aladdin yet?
Student: Don't spoil it!
Professor: Spoil what?! That's like if another Titanic movie came out and you told someone not to spoil it! In what universe would they not end up together?!
Professor: I don't hate myself enough to exercise.
*student asks what promiscuity means*
Professor: That's "get up in your club and whatever with your whatever."
All right, well, I hope that wasn't a total waste of your time. Fare thee well, my friends.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
Wednesday, July 17, 2019
A Beautiful World
Well, the semester's winding down. I have a few finals and just a couple assignments, and then I'm done with my second semester and freshman year of college.
If I've learned anything from the past few months, it's been to appreciate all the immense and incredible beauty in the world.
In my English class, I've learned to see the beauty in human beings and in life itself.
In Teachings of the Book of Mormon, I've learned more about the beauty of the gospel and The Book of Mormon itself.
In Psychology, I've learned about the beauty of our minds, and just how beautiful and wonderful it is to think and feel.
In Humanities, I've learned about the beauty we're capable of creating.
In Math, I've learned to see the beauty in the seemingly insignificant numbers and figures in day-to-day life.
My roommates have shown me the beauty of laughter and kindness.
Others have shown me the beauty of a friendly smile.
I can look out the window and see the Rexburg Temple, and when that's coupled by one of Rexburg's gorgeous sunsets, the sight takes my breath away. I've seen a stormy sky give way to peace and calm. I've walked through the gardens and fallen in love with the flowers and trees so meticulously cared for.
Life isn't perfect--not even close. But wowzers, is it amazing to look at.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
If I've learned anything from the past few months, it's been to appreciate all the immense and incredible beauty in the world.
In my English class, I've learned to see the beauty in human beings and in life itself.
In Teachings of the Book of Mormon, I've learned more about the beauty of the gospel and The Book of Mormon itself.
In Psychology, I've learned about the beauty of our minds, and just how beautiful and wonderful it is to think and feel.
In Humanities, I've learned about the beauty we're capable of creating.
In Math, I've learned to see the beauty in the seemingly insignificant numbers and figures in day-to-day life.
My roommates have shown me the beauty of laughter and kindness.
Others have shown me the beauty of a friendly smile.
I can look out the window and see the Rexburg Temple, and when that's coupled by one of Rexburg's gorgeous sunsets, the sight takes my breath away. I've seen a stormy sky give way to peace and calm. I've walked through the gardens and fallen in love with the flowers and trees so meticulously cared for.
Life isn't perfect--not even close. But wowzers, is it amazing to look at.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
Sunday, June 30, 2019
To Those Who Suffer
You know, I'd have to say my life is pretty good. I grew up with loving parents who took care of my siblings and me. We weren't necessarily rich, but we always had food, shelter, and Christmas presents. I have a religion I love. I've had good friends throughout the years, and many of them have stuck through until now. I love my school, I usually enjoy my job, I loved both junior high and high school.
But, as I'm sure you're all aware, no life is without hardships.
My maternal grandfather died when I was eleven, and my paternal grandmother died when I was fourteen. I struggled with P.E. classes all throughout junior high, even to the point of breaking down in tears at the mere thought of going. I went on trek and hated almost every second of it. I got horribly sick afterwards and was practically bedridden for nearly two weeks. My friends have gone through all sorts of physical and mental ailments, from FIRES to severe depression and anxiety, from colon issues to suicidal thoughts. Couples I looked up to got divorced. Friends became people I didn't want to be associated with anymore.
However, it could be so much worse.
Starting high school was one of the most difficult things I've ever done, as I think I've mentioned before. Something about it was just so jarring and unfamiliar to me that I often described myself as a piece from the wrong puzzle: I look like I need to be somewhere specific, but I really don't belong there, and making me fit in will only cause problems.
I had really loved junior high, and to say I was hesitant to leave would be an understatement. I was in an entirely new situation, which freaked me out. Most of my friends had vastly different schedules, so I couldn't rely on them as much as I previously had. There were only a couple classes I really felt happy to be in.
I was miserable, but I didn't want to be that way anymore. I came to understand that permanence is important, and that basing all my happiness on something temporary would only leave me in despair. I realized that there's no one specific thing, person, class, etc. that could provide me happiness. I had to rely on many people, many books, many friends. But for me, the one permanent thing that I knew would never let me down was the gospel of Jesus Christ.
I know that for some of you, that's not it. I'm not saying it has to be. For me, though, that was the only way. And because of that--because I found something I knew I could hold on to--I learned to smile and to laugh with meaning. I knew that the bad days were still going to come. I knew that I'd still be stressed and worried. I knew that my friends would still have their problems. But I also knew that none of that would last forever. None of it.
I know that life is hard. I haven't even experienced the worst things about life, and I am still confident in saying that life is hard. There's no quick and easy fix that will solve all your problems and allow to live happily ever after. It doesn't work like that. What does work is finding something permanent--something that cannot be taken from you--and holding onto that like your life depends on it. It just might.
So, to those who suffer, please remember that you are not alone, and that every night must come to an end. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, but it's your job to keep moving towards it. I know you can.
I love you.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
But, as I'm sure you're all aware, no life is without hardships.
My maternal grandfather died when I was eleven, and my paternal grandmother died when I was fourteen. I struggled with P.E. classes all throughout junior high, even to the point of breaking down in tears at the mere thought of going. I went on trek and hated almost every second of it. I got horribly sick afterwards and was practically bedridden for nearly two weeks. My friends have gone through all sorts of physical and mental ailments, from FIRES to severe depression and anxiety, from colon issues to suicidal thoughts. Couples I looked up to got divorced. Friends became people I didn't want to be associated with anymore.
However, it could be so much worse.
Starting high school was one of the most difficult things I've ever done, as I think I've mentioned before. Something about it was just so jarring and unfamiliar to me that I often described myself as a piece from the wrong puzzle: I look like I need to be somewhere specific, but I really don't belong there, and making me fit in will only cause problems.
I had really loved junior high, and to say I was hesitant to leave would be an understatement. I was in an entirely new situation, which freaked me out. Most of my friends had vastly different schedules, so I couldn't rely on them as much as I previously had. There were only a couple classes I really felt happy to be in.
I was miserable, but I didn't want to be that way anymore. I came to understand that permanence is important, and that basing all my happiness on something temporary would only leave me in despair. I realized that there's no one specific thing, person, class, etc. that could provide me happiness. I had to rely on many people, many books, many friends. But for me, the one permanent thing that I knew would never let me down was the gospel of Jesus Christ.
I know that for some of you, that's not it. I'm not saying it has to be. For me, though, that was the only way. And because of that--because I found something I knew I could hold on to--I learned to smile and to laugh with meaning. I knew that the bad days were still going to come. I knew that I'd still be stressed and worried. I knew that my friends would still have their problems. But I also knew that none of that would last forever. None of it.
I know that life is hard. I haven't even experienced the worst things about life, and I am still confident in saying that life is hard. There's no quick and easy fix that will solve all your problems and allow to live happily ever after. It doesn't work like that. What does work is finding something permanent--something that cannot be taken from you--and holding onto that like your life depends on it. It just might.
So, to those who suffer, please remember that you are not alone, and that every night must come to an end. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, but it's your job to keep moving towards it. I know you can.
I love you.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
Sunday, June 2, 2019
Not a Paid Promotion
Sometimes I wonder if I'm really as introverted as I think I am. And then we have eight people join our usual five on what I anticipated to be a quiet Sunday and I realize that I'm even more introverted than I think I am.
Anyway, that has nothing to do with what I'm about to write, but now you know.
Today, I would like to tell you a story.
It was Friday night. My roommates were all out with guys, and I was thoroughly enjoying Lord of the Rings. They slowly trickled back to the apartment, and my dear roommate Hannah soon arrived.
We got to talking, as we're wont to do, and soon the conversation turned to keyboarding. As usually occurs when the conversation pops up, my mind wandered back to third grade, when we used Dance Mat Typing to learn how to type properly. I, however, had misunderstood some of my teacher's instructions, so every time we went to the computer lab to practice, I started at the beginning instead of continuing from where I'd left off. This meant I did the home row lesson an inordinate amount of times. Eventually, though, I was set on the right path.
I told Hannah this story, and then looked up Dance Mat Typing just to show her. She'd done it as well, so you know what we did until 3:00 in the morning? We played Dance Mat Typing on our individual laptops until we completed all the lessons.
Was it a waste of time or a waste of time? I mean, what else would we have been doing? Sleeping?
Typing is basically a way of life at this point. I do it often enough, anyway. And not to brag, but I'm pretty fast. I'll never forget my seventh grade keyboarding class, where I finished all the lessons by the time we were halfway through the semester, so my teacher found random articles for me to transcribe. It was actually kind of fun, not going to lie. This same teacher also watched me type once and said, "You're going to melt the keyboard, you're going so fast."
In case you were concerned, no keyboards were harmed in the making of this typist.
Anyway...information you didn't need but that I was going to share anyway. Bye now.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
Anyway, that has nothing to do with what I'm about to write, but now you know.
Today, I would like to tell you a story.
It was Friday night. My roommates were all out with guys, and I was thoroughly enjoying Lord of the Rings. They slowly trickled back to the apartment, and my dear roommate Hannah soon arrived.
We got to talking, as we're wont to do, and soon the conversation turned to keyboarding. As usually occurs when the conversation pops up, my mind wandered back to third grade, when we used Dance Mat Typing to learn how to type properly. I, however, had misunderstood some of my teacher's instructions, so every time we went to the computer lab to practice, I started at the beginning instead of continuing from where I'd left off. This meant I did the home row lesson an inordinate amount of times. Eventually, though, I was set on the right path.
I told Hannah this story, and then looked up Dance Mat Typing just to show her. She'd done it as well, so you know what we did until 3:00 in the morning? We played Dance Mat Typing on our individual laptops until we completed all the lessons.
Was it a waste of time or a waste of time? I mean, what else would we have been doing? Sleeping?
Typing is basically a way of life at this point. I do it often enough, anyway. And not to brag, but I'm pretty fast. I'll never forget my seventh grade keyboarding class, where I finished all the lessons by the time we were halfway through the semester, so my teacher found random articles for me to transcribe. It was actually kind of fun, not going to lie. This same teacher also watched me type once and said, "You're going to melt the keyboard, you're going so fast."
In case you were concerned, no keyboards were harmed in the making of this typist.
Anyway...information you didn't need but that I was going to share anyway. Bye now.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
Wednesday, May 22, 2019
Ramblings of a Bored College Student
I thought I had something to write, so I opened this up. And now I realize I don't have anything to write. At least, nothing you'd be interested in reading, anyway. Not that there's anyone out there, but still.
Remember back when I was a junior in high school? When my blog was updated almost every single week at least once just because I had so much to say? It's been two and a half years, and I've had so many experiences and have grown so much since then. And now I have even less to say.
Maybe it's because it was an assignment back then, so I knew I needed to write. Or maybe I've just spilled out everything of interest onto these documents now, so everything left inside my head is fairly worthless in Blogville.
Or maybe I'm just not trying hard enough.
I could write about how different this semester has been for me. It's been harder than I expected it to be--harder than I think even last semester was, and that was my very first time in college.
I could write about how much I miss being in a Spanish class. That's been on my mind lately, especially since I've had multiple dreams about my Spanish classes in high school.
I could write about my awesome roommates, both previous and current. They're all pretty dang cool, so it wouldn't be hard.
I could write absolute nonsense. I could totally make up a story and you'd have no reason to not believe that it was real.
I could write about how lonely I feel. I can assure you, that would not be a short post.
But what do I do? I write about what I could be writing about. And if that doesn't sum me up, I don't know what does.
And yet, somehow those few paragraphs were far more therapeutic than anything else I've written in a good long while.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
Thursday, May 16, 2019
Mis Amigos
What? Two posts in one week? What is this, 2016?
No, I'm just bored and don't want to study for my psychology exam, so I figured I'd write. It's a healthy coping mechanism, I'm sure.
Today's one-sided discussion: why our circles of friends change.
So, I had a solid five best friends throughout elementary school, plus others scattered throughout. My best friend was Diana. We were in the same class from first to fifth grade, and we also went to church together. We hung out almost every single Friday throughout the school year, and then pretty often throughout summers and off-tracks as well.
Savannah and I were also very close. We had first, third, fourth, and sixth grade together. I didn't hang out with her as much as I did with Diana, but we still did so. She also went to church with me.
Diana, Savannah, and I were all very close, and it seemed like that bond would last forever.
I also had Katie, Amanda, and Nathan, plus a few others that I was friends with off and on.
When it came to junior high, Savannah went to Jefferson, which most kids from Beehive Elementary went to. Diana was planning on going to Bennion, and after considerable thought, so did I. The three of us managed to remain close to each other, mostly through church, but I think we were a little oblivious to the fact we were still growing apart.
However, in junior high, Diana and I started to separate a bit. There was a moment when it seemed everything was going to collapse, but we worked through it. But we were finding new friends, and that was okay.
My group in junior high consisted mainly of Bailey, Alida, and Payton. Especially during ninth grade, we were nigh inseparable. Bailey eventually became my best friend. I was also close to Miranda, Kaitlynne, Darcy, Sarah, and Kassidy. As ninth grade progressed, I suddenly began doubting if I really wanted to go to Kearns instead of Taylorsville with my new friends. Ultimately, I chose the latter, and I've never really looked back.
In high school, I remained close to Alida (who then became my best friend) and Bailey, and I grew closer to Jacquie and Kamerin, and then made friends with Sophie and Brandon. Those six are the ones I consider my overall best friends. I still was good friends with Kaitlynne and Kassidy, and I had plenty of other friends as well, especially my senior year.
Now that I'm in college, I'm still in contact with quite a few, plus friends I made at work as well. But, my close friends are mostly just my roommates: Heidi, Hannah, Kris, and Alexus. I don't even really have friends in my classes.
Anyway, now to the point:
What made it change? What made Diana my elementary best friend, Bailey my junior high best friend, and Alida my high school best friend? It's not as if I'd moved or had fallen out of contact with them. But somehow, there was a change.
I think we all experience something similar at some point in our lives. I know in movies and books, the protagonist often has the person who's been their best friend since toddler-age, but I've never seen that in real life.
Outward factors can offer explanations. If someone moves, it's obviously more difficult to keep up a friendship. If someone turns into a bully or starts doing things the other person doesn't agree with, that can cause a riff.
But I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that we ourselves change. In elementary, Diana was the perfect playmate, and we both loved reading and being smart. But we were opposites in a lot of ways, so I think we balanced each other out. In junior high, though, as I was growing into the sarcastic, clever person I am today, Bailey and I played off each other more perfectly than I could've ever hoped. And then in high school, Alida and I needed to entertain and strengthen each other, and we did it every single day.
Now that I'm in college, there doesn't seem to be as much of a need for that one best friend. Last semester, it definitely was Jacquie, and this semester probably goes to Hannah, but I feel like I've grown close to all of my roommates, both from last semester and this semester. It's interesting how much it's become more of a need to have people to fall back on rather than a few people who I spent the majority of my time with.
I feel like this is a good time to mention that I'm wearing sunglasses as I type this, even though I'm inside and it's 9:42pm. I just needed to feel cool for a bit--you do it your way, I'll do it mine.
Regardless of the reasons or the necessity or the desire, we all need friends. And if you don't think you have any, reach out because I'm sure you do. And if you really, truly don't, you've got me. And I like to think I'm a pretty cool person.
Fare thee well, my friends.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
No, I'm just bored and don't want to study for my psychology exam, so I figured I'd write. It's a healthy coping mechanism, I'm sure.
Today's one-sided discussion: why our circles of friends change.
So, I had a solid five best friends throughout elementary school, plus others scattered throughout. My best friend was Diana. We were in the same class from first to fifth grade, and we also went to church together. We hung out almost every single Friday throughout the school year, and then pretty often throughout summers and off-tracks as well.
Savannah and I were also very close. We had first, third, fourth, and sixth grade together. I didn't hang out with her as much as I did with Diana, but we still did so. She also went to church with me.
Diana, Savannah, and I were all very close, and it seemed like that bond would last forever.
I also had Katie, Amanda, and Nathan, plus a few others that I was friends with off and on.
When it came to junior high, Savannah went to Jefferson, which most kids from Beehive Elementary went to. Diana was planning on going to Bennion, and after considerable thought, so did I. The three of us managed to remain close to each other, mostly through church, but I think we were a little oblivious to the fact we were still growing apart.
However, in junior high, Diana and I started to separate a bit. There was a moment when it seemed everything was going to collapse, but we worked through it. But we were finding new friends, and that was okay.
My group in junior high consisted mainly of Bailey, Alida, and Payton. Especially during ninth grade, we were nigh inseparable. Bailey eventually became my best friend. I was also close to Miranda, Kaitlynne, Darcy, Sarah, and Kassidy. As ninth grade progressed, I suddenly began doubting if I really wanted to go to Kearns instead of Taylorsville with my new friends. Ultimately, I chose the latter, and I've never really looked back.
In high school, I remained close to Alida (who then became my best friend) and Bailey, and I grew closer to Jacquie and Kamerin, and then made friends with Sophie and Brandon. Those six are the ones I consider my overall best friends. I still was good friends with Kaitlynne and Kassidy, and I had plenty of other friends as well, especially my senior year.
Now that I'm in college, I'm still in contact with quite a few, plus friends I made at work as well. But, my close friends are mostly just my roommates: Heidi, Hannah, Kris, and Alexus. I don't even really have friends in my classes.
Anyway, now to the point:
What made it change? What made Diana my elementary best friend, Bailey my junior high best friend, and Alida my high school best friend? It's not as if I'd moved or had fallen out of contact with them. But somehow, there was a change.
I think we all experience something similar at some point in our lives. I know in movies and books, the protagonist often has the person who's been their best friend since toddler-age, but I've never seen that in real life.
Outward factors can offer explanations. If someone moves, it's obviously more difficult to keep up a friendship. If someone turns into a bully or starts doing things the other person doesn't agree with, that can cause a riff.
But I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that we ourselves change. In elementary, Diana was the perfect playmate, and we both loved reading and being smart. But we were opposites in a lot of ways, so I think we balanced each other out. In junior high, though, as I was growing into the sarcastic, clever person I am today, Bailey and I played off each other more perfectly than I could've ever hoped. And then in high school, Alida and I needed to entertain and strengthen each other, and we did it every single day.
Now that I'm in college, there doesn't seem to be as much of a need for that one best friend. Last semester, it definitely was Jacquie, and this semester probably goes to Hannah, but I feel like I've grown close to all of my roommates, both from last semester and this semester. It's interesting how much it's become more of a need to have people to fall back on rather than a few people who I spent the majority of my time with.
I feel like this is a good time to mention that I'm wearing sunglasses as I type this, even though I'm inside and it's 9:42pm. I just needed to feel cool for a bit--you do it your way, I'll do it mine.
Regardless of the reasons or the necessity or the desire, we all need friends. And if you don't think you have any, reach out because I'm sure you do. And if you really, truly don't, you've got me. And I like to think I'm a pretty cool person.
Fare thee well, my friends.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
Tuesday, May 14, 2019
Have a Laugh
Last semester was filled with plenty of memorable quotes, and upon reading back through them today, I thought I'd share. Enjoy.
Science
Professor: A star died for your smartphone.
Student who hasn't seen his friend in a week: We're together, and that's what matters.
Professor: This trilobite died nearly instantly.
Student: Good.
Professor, showing us a picture of an unfolded trilobite: It looks like a psychotic centipede.
Student: It helps them live and keep alive.
Student: I would not want to be the wife of that giraffe...if I was a giraffe.
Professor: Evolution doesn't mean progress. I saw the 2012 Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and was horrified. What a fall for Mickey.
Professor: PhD's don't make you immune to foolish decisions.
Religion
Professor: Every roommate needs a pillow to the head unexpectedly at least once. It keeps things real.
Music & the Humanities
Professor: Most operas are solidly PG-12.
Professor: The 80's got so much better with Weird Al.
Professor: Crosswalks. Pedestrians have the right of way, just freakin' go.
Professor, after we didn't laugh at a dumb joke: Boy, you guys don't realize I hold account over your grades.
Professor, teaching us about the harpsichord: So prominent in the Baroque period because they didn't have access to banjos.
Professor: Hades gets to hang out with all the most interesting people.
Student: Do I have to take the test?
Professor: No. You don't have to do anything.
Professor: It sounds like an oboe...being played by a blind person whose hands are tied behind their back and their nose is covered in duct tape and they've been shot in the leg. In that way, yes, it sounds like an oboe.
*showing us pictures of the Palace of Versailles*
Professor: That's oppressive.
Professor: Present company excluded, I usually have very positive experiences with students.
Professor: If you ever need to sound important, just Latinize your name."
Spanish (the funniest)
FYI, my professor had us call him by his first name, which is Chad.
*a class on another floor starts singing*
Chad: Is that music? What the flip. Is that a monk choir?
Chad: You're bored. You hate me. I can see hatred in your hearts.
Chad: How do you say that in French?
French Student: *responds in French*
Chad: ...That's what I thought.
Chad: Let's say Gavin has a girlfriend, and she gives him what?
Student: Six.
Chad: I'm sorry, she gives him what?
Student: Six. The number six.
Chad: See me after class, you have issues.
Chad: This thing sounds like it wants to make noise.
Student: That's a nice tie.
Chad: I've worn it every frickin' day.
Chad, giving an example sentence: "Chad vendió sus carros a su hermana." [Chad sold his cars to his sister.]
Me, answering: "Chad se lo vendió." [Chad sold them to her.]
*student raises hand*
Chad: JT, why do you disagree?
Student under his breath: Chad doesn't have multiple cars.
Practice sentence: "Dalton tiene más de un millón de dólares." [Dalton has more than a million dollars, meaning he has a million dollars, among other things.]
Chad: So what does this mean?
Student: Él puede comprar un Jeep. [He can buy a Jeep.]
Chad: What the flip kind of answer was that?
*the French class next door starts singing*
Chad: Wait. Is that a French Christmas song?
Student: ...It's "Jingle Bells."
Student: I'd rather be sad in an expensive car than in a cardboard box.
*student asks if we can deliver our finished finals to Chad's house*
Chad: You can't see my hand in my pocket right now, but I'm giving you a gesture.
Anyway, I hope that was semi-enjoyable for you. If not, sorry. I enjoyed it, so there.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
Science
Professor: A star died for your smartphone.
Student who hasn't seen his friend in a week: We're together, and that's what matters.
Professor: This trilobite died nearly instantly.
Student: Good.
Professor, showing us a picture of an unfolded trilobite: It looks like a psychotic centipede.
Student: It helps them live and keep alive.
Student: I would not want to be the wife of that giraffe...if I was a giraffe.
Professor: Evolution doesn't mean progress. I saw the 2012 Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and was horrified. What a fall for Mickey.
Professor: PhD's don't make you immune to foolish decisions.
Religion
Professor: Every roommate needs a pillow to the head unexpectedly at least once. It keeps things real.
Music & the Humanities
Professor: Most operas are solidly PG-12.
Professor: The 80's got so much better with Weird Al.
Professor: Crosswalks. Pedestrians have the right of way, just freakin' go.
Professor, after we didn't laugh at a dumb joke: Boy, you guys don't realize I hold account over your grades.
Professor, teaching us about the harpsichord: So prominent in the Baroque period because they didn't have access to banjos.
Professor: Hades gets to hang out with all the most interesting people.
Student: Do I have to take the test?
Professor: No. You don't have to do anything.
Professor: It sounds like an oboe...being played by a blind person whose hands are tied behind their back and their nose is covered in duct tape and they've been shot in the leg. In that way, yes, it sounds like an oboe.
*showing us pictures of the Palace of Versailles*
Professor: That's oppressive.
Professor: Present company excluded, I usually have very positive experiences with students.
Professor: If you ever need to sound important, just Latinize your name."
Spanish (the funniest)
FYI, my professor had us call him by his first name, which is Chad.
*a class on another floor starts singing*
Chad: Is that music? What the flip. Is that a monk choir?
Chad: You're bored. You hate me. I can see hatred in your hearts.
Chad: How do you say that in French?
French Student: *responds in French*
Chad: ...That's what I thought.
Chad: Let's say Gavin has a girlfriend, and she gives him what?
Student: Six.
Chad: I'm sorry, she gives him what?
Student: Six. The number six.
Chad: See me after class, you have issues.
Chad: This thing sounds like it wants to make noise.
Student: That's a nice tie.
Chad: I've worn it every frickin' day.
Chad, giving an example sentence: "Chad vendió sus carros a su hermana." [Chad sold his cars to his sister.]
Me, answering: "Chad se lo vendió." [Chad sold them to her.]
*student raises hand*
Chad: JT, why do you disagree?
Student under his breath: Chad doesn't have multiple cars.
Practice sentence: "Dalton tiene más de un millón de dólares." [Dalton has more than a million dollars, meaning he has a million dollars, among other things.]
Chad: So what does this mean?
Student: Él puede comprar un Jeep. [He can buy a Jeep.]
Chad: What the flip kind of answer was that?
*the French class next door starts singing*
Chad: Wait. Is that a French Christmas song?
Student: ...It's "Jingle Bells."
Student: I'd rather be sad in an expensive car than in a cardboard box.
*student asks if we can deliver our finished finals to Chad's house*
Chad: You can't see my hand in my pocket right now, but I'm giving you a gesture.
Anyway, I hope that was semi-enjoyable for you. If not, sorry. I enjoyed it, so there.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
Wednesday, May 8, 2019
None of My Own Words
Be of great heart, and fear less. I know you don't believe it, but I promise you, life will carry you through. You'll even get to like each other afterwards. (Porfiry Petrovich from Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoyevsky)
And if they drag you through the mud, it doesn't change what's in your blood. ("Be Still" by The Killers)
The darkest hour has only sixty minutes. (Morris Mandel)
There's nothing more lovely, there's nothing more profound than the certainty that all of this will end. ("The One Moment" by OK Go)
Lay down your sweet and weary head. Why do you weep? What are these tears upon your face? Soon you will see, all of your fears will pass away, safe in my arms. ("Into the West" by Annie Lennox)
You are the storm. (unknown)
You will be found. ("You Will Be Found" from Dear Evan Hansen)
Yes, there is weakness. There is frailty. There is courage also, and honor to be found. (Boromir from The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring)
Your friends are with you. (Legolas from The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers)
Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times if one only remembers to turn on the light. (Albus Dumbledore from Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban)
You were born with goodness. ("Right Behind You" by Brandon Flowers)
I'll catch you. (Kelsier from Mistborn: The Final Empire by Brandon Sanderson)
Oh my darling, you're more than enough. (unknown)
Those who have hope, have everything. (Panda Express fortune)
On your feet. (Aragorn from The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring)
Even the smallest person can change the course of the future. (Galadriel from The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring)
Nothing happened because you were here. And I sleep soundly at night knowing you always will be. (Julia from Mission: Impossible -- Fallout)
Take my hand--I'll lead you to salvation. Take my love, for love is everlasting. And remember the truth that once was spoken: To love another person is to see the face of God. ("Epilogue" from Les Misérables)
There's some good in this world, and it's worth fighting for. (Sam from The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers)
You know where to go, you have been there before in your heart. ("Neverland (Reprise)" from Finding Neverland)
You would live a hundred years if I could show you how. I won't desert you now. ("A Little Fall of Rain" from Les Misérables)
No more talk of darkness. Forget these wide-eyed fears. I'm here--nothing will harm you. My words will warm and calm you. ("All I Ask of You" from The Phantom of the Opera)
To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. (Oscar Wilde)
So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay. You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight. ("Light in the Hallway" by Pentatonix)
And if they drag you through the mud, it doesn't change what's in your blood. ("Be Still" by The Killers)
The darkest hour has only sixty minutes. (Morris Mandel)
There's nothing more lovely, there's nothing more profound than the certainty that all of this will end. ("The One Moment" by OK Go)
Lay down your sweet and weary head. Why do you weep? What are these tears upon your face? Soon you will see, all of your fears will pass away, safe in my arms. ("Into the West" by Annie Lennox)
You are the storm. (unknown)
You will be found. ("You Will Be Found" from Dear Evan Hansen)
Yes, there is weakness. There is frailty. There is courage also, and honor to be found. (Boromir from The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring)
Your friends are with you. (Legolas from The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers)
Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times if one only remembers to turn on the light. (Albus Dumbledore from Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban)
You were born with goodness. ("Right Behind You" by Brandon Flowers)
I'll catch you. (Kelsier from Mistborn: The Final Empire by Brandon Sanderson)
Oh my darling, you're more than enough. (unknown)
Those who have hope, have everything. (Panda Express fortune)
On your feet. (Aragorn from The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring)
Even the smallest person can change the course of the future. (Galadriel from The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring)
Nothing happened because you were here. And I sleep soundly at night knowing you always will be. (Julia from Mission: Impossible -- Fallout)
Take my hand--I'll lead you to salvation. Take my love, for love is everlasting. And remember the truth that once was spoken: To love another person is to see the face of God. ("Epilogue" from Les Misérables)
There's some good in this world, and it's worth fighting for. (Sam from The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers)
You know where to go, you have been there before in your heart. ("Neverland (Reprise)" from Finding Neverland)
You would live a hundred years if I could show you how. I won't desert you now. ("A Little Fall of Rain" from Les Misérables)
No more talk of darkness. Forget these wide-eyed fears. I'm here--nothing will harm you. My words will warm and calm you. ("All I Ask of You" from The Phantom of the Opera)
To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. (Oscar Wilde)
So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay. You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight. ("Light in the Hallway" by Pentatonix)
Tuesday, January 22, 2019
Chocolate-Covered Blueberries
I really love chocolate-covered blueberries.
I remember having them when I was younger, and then they just sort of disappeared from my life for a time, occasionally popping up to surprise me with a couple delectable bites. Then, once I got a job and had the money to buy my own stuff, I eventually remembered that I enjoyed them and bought some for myself.
It's like being reunited with an old lover. Or so I assume. I've actually never experienced that.
Anyway...
Because BYU-Idaho has a three-track system, the schedules are pretty different from the other schools. This meant that when almost everyone I knew was back in school in the middle of August, I sat comfortably in the knowledge that I still had another month.
Don't get me wrong; it was a little boring sometimes. But I really learned how to manage my free time when I only had myself to entertain me. Many days involved watching a movie while eating a cream cheese Danish and/or chocolate-covered blueberries.
And I'm not quite sure why, but there's something oddly fitting about eating chocolate-covered blueberries while watching the fifth Mission: Impossible movie. Maybe it was a life-changing experience or something that's stuck with me ever since.
But I digress.
So, in the middle of September, I headed up to BYU-Idaho with about half a bag of chocolate-covered blueberries (besides all my other possessions). For the first couple weeks, I'd snack on them occasionally, but once I'd gotten to about a quarter of a bag, I decided to save the rest.
Well, I sort of forgot about that.
Then, one day, in what was probably November, I suddenly remembered that I had not yet finished my blueberries.
Finishing that back was one of the most comforting moments I experienced during that first semester.
What was the point of this tale, you may ask? Well...
I like chocolate-covered blueberries.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
I remember having them when I was younger, and then they just sort of disappeared from my life for a time, occasionally popping up to surprise me with a couple delectable bites. Then, once I got a job and had the money to buy my own stuff, I eventually remembered that I enjoyed them and bought some for myself.
It's like being reunited with an old lover. Or so I assume. I've actually never experienced that.
Anyway...
Because BYU-Idaho has a three-track system, the schedules are pretty different from the other schools. This meant that when almost everyone I knew was back in school in the middle of August, I sat comfortably in the knowledge that I still had another month.
Don't get me wrong; it was a little boring sometimes. But I really learned how to manage my free time when I only had myself to entertain me. Many days involved watching a movie while eating a cream cheese Danish and/or chocolate-covered blueberries.
And I'm not quite sure why, but there's something oddly fitting about eating chocolate-covered blueberries while watching the fifth Mission: Impossible movie. Maybe it was a life-changing experience or something that's stuck with me ever since.
But I digress.
So, in the middle of September, I headed up to BYU-Idaho with about half a bag of chocolate-covered blueberries (besides all my other possessions). For the first couple weeks, I'd snack on them occasionally, but once I'd gotten to about a quarter of a bag, I decided to save the rest.
Well, I sort of forgot about that.
Then, one day, in what was probably November, I suddenly remembered that I had not yet finished my blueberries.
Finishing that back was one of the most comforting moments I experienced during that first semester.
What was the point of this tale, you may ask? Well...
I like chocolate-covered blueberries.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
Tuesday, January 8, 2019
An Ode to the Stillness and Silence of the Night
I could go to sleep. I mean, it's almost eleven o'clock and I have work tomorrow morning at 8:30. Officially, it's because my hair's wet and there are few things I hate more than sleeping with wet hair.
In reality, though, it's because the more enticing option is to sit here and type while my space heater does miracles and I listen to various scores from the Mission: Impossible movies.
And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why I have next to no social life.
Not that I'm complaining. Trust me, if I wanted to be sociable and spend my nights out on the town, I would. But I learned long ago that that is simply not the life for me. I much prefer to sit comfortably, all wrapped up in a blanket, and read a book, listen to music, write nonsense, or watch a movie. And if I'm really ambitious, I'll do all four (but not at the same time).
I just love staying up. Night time is my time, and I think part of it has to do with the fact that I have no choice but to retreat into my own little world. I can be as thoroughly emotional or emotionless as I so choose, and it affects no one but myself. No one ever need know that I've kept the same score on repeat since ten o'clock.
Well, I suppose you now know.
Oh, but I truly do hate waking up before nine in the morning. 8:00 to 8:30 is manageable, but in my opinion, there's no reason the world should start before eight in the morning. Alas, I am not in charge, and the world keeps waking up at dismally early hours.
Sometimes I wonder if there's a purpose to it -- me staying up late, I mean. I know for myself that I thoroughly enjoy these silent hours that I can mold with my thoughts.
Is it lonely? Oh, terribly. But I enjoy that. I like being alone, and I think that's part of the reason I enjoy staying up late -- I can be by myself with no one to interrupt me. But then there are times I look around and truly feel the emptiness in the silence. There are certainly nights when I desperately wish there was someone else to enjoy the quiet with me.
The wonderful thing is, there are plenty of people who gladly would.
But for now, I just sit here in my room, typing out my random thoughts and wondering how on earth we got to this point. I've gotten used to it by now, though.
I still wish I didn't have to work at 8:30 tomorrow morning, however.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
In reality, though, it's because the more enticing option is to sit here and type while my space heater does miracles and I listen to various scores from the Mission: Impossible movies.
And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why I have next to no social life.
Not that I'm complaining. Trust me, if I wanted to be sociable and spend my nights out on the town, I would. But I learned long ago that that is simply not the life for me. I much prefer to sit comfortably, all wrapped up in a blanket, and read a book, listen to music, write nonsense, or watch a movie. And if I'm really ambitious, I'll do all four (but not at the same time).
I just love staying up. Night time is my time, and I think part of it has to do with the fact that I have no choice but to retreat into my own little world. I can be as thoroughly emotional or emotionless as I so choose, and it affects no one but myself. No one ever need know that I've kept the same score on repeat since ten o'clock.
Well, I suppose you now know.
Oh, but I truly do hate waking up before nine in the morning. 8:00 to 8:30 is manageable, but in my opinion, there's no reason the world should start before eight in the morning. Alas, I am not in charge, and the world keeps waking up at dismally early hours.
Sometimes I wonder if there's a purpose to it -- me staying up late, I mean. I know for myself that I thoroughly enjoy these silent hours that I can mold with my thoughts.
Is it lonely? Oh, terribly. But I enjoy that. I like being alone, and I think that's part of the reason I enjoy staying up late -- I can be by myself with no one to interrupt me. But then there are times I look around and truly feel the emptiness in the silence. There are certainly nights when I desperately wish there was someone else to enjoy the quiet with me.
The wonderful thing is, there are plenty of people who gladly would.
But for now, I just sit here in my room, typing out my random thoughts and wondering how on earth we got to this point. I've gotten used to it by now, though.
I still wish I didn't have to work at 8:30 tomorrow morning, however.
"So count your blessings every day. It makes the monsters go away. And everything will be okay.
"You are not alone. You are right at home. Goodnight."
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