Dating

     Quit squirming uncomfortably or giggling uncontrollably (whichever applies to you).  I don't think I need to remind you who is writing this blog.  Do you really think that I, of all people, will be writing about the joys and magic of dating?
     As a matter of fact, I couldn't write about it even if I wanted to, because I've never been on one.  Ofttimes, when others hear about this, they become extraordinarily shocked and tell me that it's the best part of high school, but chill--I don't care.  However, that does not mean that I don't have opinions on dating.
    And before you decide that this blog post is going to be too serious for your taste, chill.  This is not a rant.  You'll like my opinions, especially if we have similar personalities.
     First off, there's nothing wrong with courtesy.  I know plenty of girls that are genuinely offended when their male date holds a door open for them or whatnot.  "I can open doors by myself!" is the disgusted outcry.  Well, of course you can.  Your date is probably fully aware of the fact that females are perfectly capable of opening doors, and especially you because he likes and respects you, which is probably at least part of the reason you were asked out in the first place.  (I'll patiently wait for your jaw drops to finish.)  This is also why he'll hold open a door for you.  It's not a negative mark; it's very positive.  It's a little something called "being polite."  Believe it or not, it's not a relatively new concept.  (I'll patiently wait for you to finish being sore.)
     Another thing about dates is they'd better be fun, or at least enjoyable, for both parties involved.  I would not invite you to sit and listen to music while alphabetizing or staring at lists of names (unless you liked that sort of thing), so you'd better not be asking me out to go play sports or go shopping.  I'm not saying you have to pander to the other person, but at least be mindful of things they may not be comfortable doing, or even things they absolutely hate doing.  Again, there's that whole respect thing.
     Finally, my biggest pet peeve when it comes to dating advice is "Don't you dare take a girl out to a movie for a date because you won't be able to talk or get to know each other!"  I severely disagree.  If a guy is willing to spend money to take me to a movie we both want to see, I'll get to know him plenty (especially if he also gets popcorn).  I know that having a picnic in the grassy field of a park while watching the sun set and then talking underneath the star-sprinkled night sky is more romantic, but let's be real here: I'd rather watch Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (which I highly recommend, just so you know).  And if you're so concerned about getting to know each other, go to dinner beforehand and/or ice cream afterwards.  Chill.
     Well, that's that.  I hope I haven't offended too many of you...but I can't say I'd feel too badly if I did.  This world is too darn sensitive for me to feel bad about it anymore.
     I hope your day is as awesome as you.